Slow-Burn Epiphany

The other day, on Twitter, I said, “Acknowledging the positive is more effective than berating the negative.” What’s wrong with me? You all know that I like rage against the machine – point out what is wrong with how things are done in our society. And don’t get me wrong – I see many things wrong with how we allow our society to be run. Like, 1% of our population owning 50% of our wealth! Grrrrrrr…..

But something else has come up for me recently. It’s been like a slow-burn epiphany of sorts. Over the last few months, I have made an effort to acknowledge the positive in my life, and have begun to believe those that acknowledge the same in me. And I notice the difference! My outlook is more positive overall. In the face of the negative that happens around me, I still feel happy.

So, with this newfound positive outlook, what’s a guy to do when I see all these problems!!!? This came up on my social media accounts over the last little while. I expressed offence at consistently being referred to as a “taxpayer” in the media and by politicians of all stripes. Some people agreed and expressed their frustration while others express privilege at being acknowledged for contributing financially to our country. Differences are to be expected. But how do I reconcile this newfound positive outlook with the pointing out of problems?

I see it like this: if I’m going to point out a problem in our society/system/etc then I better be prepared to offer a solution. Or point to those that are working on a solution.

So here it is. The term “taxpayer” as the media and politicians use it, leaves out many people who can’t contribute financially to our system. It assumes they don’t have a voice because they don’t contribute. Yet, on close examination, all of us contribute in various ways – taxes being but one of those ways. Think about all the ways you contribute every day to make Canada the kind of society it is. It also assumes that all who pay taxes have a voice. This is untrue. Businesses and corporations pay taxes but are not entitled to a say in our democracy: they can’t vote or otherwise participate directly – only individual citizens can.

My solution: lets get back to referring to ourselves as citizens so we are all included! A citizen is an individual that is entitled to participate in our democracy and contributes in a variety of ways to Canadian society.

Why All the Love?

Seriously! Where does it all come from? And by love i mean trust. Trust. this is not something we normally give away for free. In fact, as a Social Worker/counsellor, trust is the primary facet of every therapeutic relationship and I work hard and carefully to earn it from every person I've every worked with. I ask for it and realize that part of earning it is giving some up to my client first - even if it hasn't been earned yet.

Trust forms part of what we call "social capital". Social capital can be described as a kind of cohesion that forms between people and organizations when people participate with each other in community and begin to trust one another. This happens over time and is either earned directly or through association with other trusted individuals.

Given the world we live in with social media dominating our relationshipscapes, Why All the Love??!

I have had this brewing in the back of my mind for a while now. But it really hit home during a recent trip to the interior. I am an avid twitterer and saw that a connection from there was also traveling to Kelowna the same time I was there. I sent her a message and asked if she would like to meet for coffee or a drink. She agreed. My friend and I went to meet her one evening and during our conversation we talked about how easily we give up trust in people we meet this way. I have had many recent examples where I meet people from twitter or elsewhere for coffee. having never met each other, without fail, one party always leaves their belongings at the table after the hand-shake to go get a coffee. Somehow, having never met you in person, I'm willing to leave my laptop, keys, cell phone etc with you. I have just transferred my trust to you.

In Kelowna, the women we met with told us that her husband had offered to come along and she declined feeling that she trusted us - two strangers. Did she have enough information from our tweets and blogs to know we were trustworthy? She noted that when she walked into the restaurant and saw us, she intuitively knew that it would be ok. How does this happen? What is it that helps us distinguish who to trust like this? Or, as we hear reports of people being stalked through social media such as FourSquare, are we just being far too trusting?

This post, I hope, will form more of a discussion. I really want input on this. what are your thoughts?

Making the Most of It

So, I signed up for Facebook this week. It's something that I said I would probably never do. But there I am. Kind of interesting. Met some people from my past that I hadn't seen or heard from for years. This phenomenon seems to have some interesting implications. For example, in the past - even a couple of years ago, connecting with someone would have taken considerable effort. Now you can be reconnected even inadvertently.

The downside can be that people can misrepresent themselves. I suppose that you could mess with people in person, but I think it just might be more difficult. Some say this electronic way of connecting and networking is not 'valid' or 'real'. Others say it is.

What do you think?